The Parents' Review

A Monthly Magazine of Home-Training and Culture

The "PR" Letter Bag.

[The Editor is not responsible for the opinions of the Correspondents.]

DEAR EDITOR,--Herbert Spencer says: "The training of children physically, morally and intellectually is dreadfully defective...because parents are devoid of that knowledge by which alone this training can be rightly guided. Is it not madness to make no provision for such a task? Better sacrifice accomplishment than omit this all-essential instruction. Judge, then, whether all who may one day be parents should not strive with some anxiety to learn these laws." Clearly after marriage is not the time to commence such education. Fatal mistakes will be made long before (in such a case) the necessary knowledge has been acquired. Can we count the hundreds of wrecked lives among young wives? The thousands of precious first-born babes who are ruthlessly sacrificed at this altar of Ignorance, worse than any Molodis? At whose door lies the blame? Not on the young girlish brides and mothers, but upon the grandmothers, who, ostrich-like, have blinded themselves and wilfully blinded their children to the all-important clauses of an accurate knowledge of Hygiene, and of moral and physical child-training. Can the members of P.N.E.U. do nothing to improve this state of things? can they not set up beacon lighthouses to prevent so many shipwrecks?

Suggestions will, one feels, be thankfully received by the Editor of P.R. from those who have thoughtfully considered the subject. May I be permitted to offer one? It is that the last two years of a girl's school life, before she "comes out," she should pass through a course of thorough practical instruction in Hygiene, Domestic economy (including cooking and management of a house), and the Kindergarten. I have no doubt that arrangements could be made at institutions already existing for the training of girls who have to earn their own living, (such as the Home of Education at Ambleside, or Mrs. Ward's Training School for Lady Nurses at Holland Park, both in connexion with P.N.E.U.) whereby other girls of independent means might receive an equally valuable practical training to fit them for the duties and trials of that utterly unknown land of wifehood and motherhood, into which they so rashly and blithely rush, to the bitter rueing of their husbands and future children. We should not hear so much of marriage being "a failure," or of "The Revolt of the Daughters," if, as some one wisely puts it in a contemporary magazine, we were wise enough to recognise the Signs of the Times and give our girls the chance to "evolve." In ancient Sparta this question anent the young wives and mothers and the future citizens of that noble little state was well provided for. Shall we be less wise?

MARY CROSSTHWAITE

DEAR EDITOR.--I have seen by letters in the Parents' Review, and I know by my own experience, that the wish to obtain a good and in the best sense helpful style of children's nurse, is often a despair to mothers, those, I mean, who cannot afford the salary of one of Miss Mason's delightful "Tantes."

I, a busy clergyman's wife, with four little ones from eight years old to as many months, have had many trials over my nurses. I could not afford the, by no means too high, salary of a "tante," and I must own that my Parents' Review was each month almost more anguish than delight to read, for the beautiful ideas and possibilities seemed so unattainable.

Now I have found a solution to one part of my difficulties, and it has been so happy an experiment, that I think many other tired, discouraged mothers may be glad to hear about it.

Taking a hint from our Review, I advertised in the Church Times and Guardian "For a Nursery Governess willing to undertake the duties of a nurse and some housework."

From numerous answers I sifted out all would be "ladies," and all so-called "helps." I wrote to a few selected ones and told them exactly what they would have to do, specially being careful to point out that it must be a little of whatever had to be done. Mothers who have little children, a large house they like kept clean, and only two servants, will understand this necessity.

For a year now I have had a dear girl with me, a north-country tradesman's daughter, well brought up, well educated, and from a comfortable home. I took pains that her bedroom, which she shares with the little girl, should be dainty and nice, screens, baths, and everything as I wish my own girl to see used. Her nursery is also a cosy, pretty room. She runs down at meal times and carries up from our table her own meals. She cleans her own nurseries and has done everything for my baby. I treat her as one of ourselves, and she has never made me repent it. She wears washing frocks always, as I prefer it with young children. I have never asked her to wear a cap. She is faithful, careful, refined, and sensible with the children. She reads eagerly the books I lend her, and the Review is her interest as well as mine.

In hopes that perhaps some other mother may be glad to hear of the possibility of a nursemore nearly approaching one's ideal than the usual class of nurse, being attainable even with small means, I venture to trouble you, dear Miss Mason, with all these details. Perhaps the most important one of all is that her salary is the very moderate one of £14 per annum.
X.Y.Z.

DEAR EDITOR.--I have tried in vain to get a book of pictures of the Old Testament suitable for my little girl aged three, in the city in which I live. I especially wanted a picture of the Garden of Eden, and the only one I could find had a huge black serpent occupying the foreground, well calculated to induce night-mare; but there were neither animals nor rivers. I should be glad to know if any of your readers can help me to find such a book. I have Mrs. Patrick Watson's "Palestine Pictures," of which I cannot speak too highly, for giving a truthful glimpse of Oriental life.
DUNELM

DEAR EDITOR.--Your correspondent, "E.M.Y.," evidently refers to "The Child's Life of Christ," published by Cassell & Co. It is the most comprehensive and interesting bible for children, and contains several chapters showing the daily habits of the Jews at the time when our Saviour was on earth. It is profusely illustrated by good artists, and is always a joy and delight to the little ones who are so fortunate as to possess it.
NINA YORKE

DEAR EDITOR.--I was much interested in the article on Children's Books in the March number of the P.R., and find many old friends among the list given. I think the Child's Bible, published by Cassell & Co., exactly answers to the description given there, and is probably the one mentioned by your correspondent, "E.M.Y.," in the May number. Our children' have had a copy in use for nine years, and we have learned to value it very highly. I should wish to add "Water Babies," by Kingsley, to the shelf of books for children's every-day life, as one of the best books for children ever written.
E.M.F.

Mrs. William Borer (Reference Secretary for Sussex) asks the help of any readers of the P.R. who have friends in that county in forming a branch in the Western Division. With a view to accomplishing this in the autumn, she is anxious to interest as many as possible this summer in the work of the P.N.E.U., and to obtain several fresh subscribers to the P.R. It will materially help Mrs. Borrer if those who are already readers of the P.R. will communicate with her, and those members who have friends in West Sussex, to whom this branch may possibly be of use, will send their names and addresses.

Parkyns Manor, Hurstpierpoint.

DEAR EDITOR.--Could any of your readers tell me of a quiet, inexpensive seaside pension in Brittany or Normandy for August? It must be easy of access from steamers as a long railway journey would add to the expense.
A.E. BRIGHT

DEAR EDITOR.--Will some experienced mother give her ideas as to the best way of giving Bible instruction in the holidays to a boy of ten, who has just gone to school. I have been in the habit for years of going into the schoolroom at 10.30, and of giving the Scripture lesson myself but I fear, if I continue to do this at this hour, the boy may resent being called away from other occupations, and I particularly wish to avoid any friction on this point. He is an only child, so there are no other children in whose instruction he would naturally join. Up to three months ago he always evinced great interest in his Scripture lesson, asking that it might be longer, but latterly he has seemed to weary of it, and to dislike saying his prayers. Have other parents found this difficulty? He is a reserved nature, disliking any demonstration.

Some of your readers have asked for some consecutive Bible history, and I can strongly recommend "Grannie's Chapters," by Lady Mary Ross, published by Hatchard in four volums, at 6s. a vol. The words are nearly as possible those of the Bible, with the necessary omissions. My boy enjoyed a chapter read to him every evening while eating his supper.
AN ANXIOUS MOTHER

DEAR EDITOR.--Would you or some of your readers help another mother looking for a first-rate day school for boys (or mixed) withtin an hour of London or at Eastbourne or Folkestone, on P.N.E.U. lines, and where natural history and practical elementary science are taught and encouraged. For a boy of nine; pretty country and intellectual society also desired.
ISABEL BAYNES

DEAR EDITOR.--I fancy your correspondent E.M.Y. in present number Parents' Review refers to The Child's Bible published by Cassell. There is a large type edition with many beautiful pictures (Sir Josh. Reynold's "Samuel" for one) bound in crimson and gold at £1 1s. I found it invaluable for our little daughters from their third birthday. Also a small edition 10s. 6d. also with good pictures. I gave a copy of this to a child who travelled with her parents a good deal, and I thought it more convenient to carry. Her mother greatly appreciated the gift. There is also "The Story of the Bible" Sunday School Union, but not told in Bible words. I wish we had a list of books with stories about animals.
A.W.

Typed by Alise Grant, Jan. 2025